Yes, it's that time once again: the day we feature your dating and relationship questions. Although we would like to answer each one personally, and with as much detail as possible, the overwhelming amount of inquiries forces us to highlight those that are most interesting to AskMen.com readers; your e-mail may even be answered in the process.
This week's Q&A focuses on getting an ex-girlfriend back, smiling too much, and when to call it quits if she's not interested. David DeAngelo, author of Double Your Dating: What Every Man Should Know About How To Be Successful With Women , has your answers.
What should a guy do if he wants to get back together with an ex-girlfriend?
If your significant other breaks up with you, two of the best things you can do to get her back are:
1- Act like you're okay with her decision to leave.
2- Start dating other people and let her know about it.
Jealousy is powerful . It's far more powerful than most people suspect.
A situation where girl "A" didn't have any feelings for you until she saw you with girl "B" is the rule , not the exception.
Jealousy causes people to do crazy things and feel very powerful emotions... from love to hate.
Trying to "get her back" is a losing game in most situations, because the act alone suggests that you're needy (especially when you don't even know a woman very well, and you're trying to "get her back" after one or two dates).
The best thing to do is get on with your life, then call your ex-girlfriend in a month or two to see if she wants to have coffee.
Don't talk about heavy things, and don't mention anything about what happened. Just be casual.
Is it possible to smile too much? Should you "pursue" women?
Do you think a man should smile in order to get a woman to like him?
This is an interesting subject.
I think that most guys smile too much when they're talking to women that they're attracted to. Now, I have to modify what I just said a bit.
How about this: Most guys smile in a way that looks like fake-approval-seeking-wussy-man when they're talking to women that they're attracted to.
I recommend that most guys learn how to control all aspects of their body language so they can quit doing things that make them seem needy, apologetic, like they're trying to get a woman's approval, etc.
And smiling is one of those aspects.
That said, I know guys who smile a lot when they're meeting women, and they do very well.
They make the right moves, so their smiling doesn't come across as them trying to be liked, kissing up to a woman, etc.
Do what works for you.
But if you've been the kind of guy that tries to get women to "like you" in the past, then you'd probably benefit from learning how to smile less , and be cocky & funny more .
Do you think a man should "pursue" a woman to try to land her?
I've noticed a pattern with guys that is very interesting to me: If a guy meets a girl and feels attracted to her, but doesn't have success taking things to a romantic level, he will tend to think about that woman and how to try again to get her attention, even when it doesn't make any sense at all, and there are many other opportunities around him .
I think that this is probably some kind of survival mechanism gone wrong. But whatever it is, it's a pain in the ass if you ask me.
In about 98% of cases, it's much better to just get on with your life and meet new women than it is to go back to an ex-girlfriend or a women you've met in the past (who, for one reason or another, didn't feel an attraction towards you) and try to get them to come around.
Move on.
This article is sponsored in part by DoubleYourDating.com (What's this?)
David DeAngelo is the author of the book Double Your Dating: What Every Man Should Know About How To Be Successful With Women, and several other products that can help men become more successful with women and dating. He also publishes a free online Dating Tips newsletter, available at www.DoubleYourDating.com.
No comments:
Post a Comment